ACT IV

I have served Prince Florizel, but now I am out of service. My father named me Autolycus, who being, as I am, littered under Mercury, was likewise a snapper-up of unconsidered trifles, and my revenue is the silly cheat. (He sees Clown approaching) A prize! A prize!

Let me see; fifteen hundred shorn, what comes the wool to?

(Aside) If the springe hold, he's mine.

I cannot do it without counters. Let me see; what am I buying for our sheepshearing fest? Three pounds of sugar, five pounds of currants, rice - what will this sister of mine do with rice? But my father hath made her mistress of the feast, and she lays it on. Saffron, mace. Dates, four pounds of prunes, and as many of raisins of the sun.

(Faking injury) O, that ever I was born!
(Grovels on the ground)

In the name of me -

O, help me, help me! Pluck but off these rags, and then death! Death!

Alack, poor soul, thou hast need of more rags to lay on thee, rather than have these off.

I am robbed, sir, and beaten, my money and apparel taken from me, and these detestable things put upon me.

 What, by a horseman, or a footman.

A footman, sweet sir, a footman.

Lend me thy hand, I'll help thee. Come, lend me thy hand.

 O, good sir, tenderly. O!

Alas, poor soul!

O, good sir, softly, good sir. I fear, sir, my shoulder blade is out.

How now? Canst stand?

(Picking Clown's pocket) Softly, dear sir; good sir, Softly. You have done me charitable office.

Dost lack money? I have a little money for thee.

No, good sweet sir; no, I beseech you, sir. I have a kinsman not past three quarters of a mile hence, unto whom I was going. Offer me no money, I pray you; that kills my heart.

What manner of fellow was he that robbed you?

A fellow sir. I knew him once a servant of the prince. I know this man well. Having flown over many knavish professions, he settled only on rogue. Some call him Autolycus.

Out upon him! Prig, for my life, thief! He haunts wakes, fairs, and bearbaitings.

Very true, sir; he. Sir, he. That's the rogue that put me into this apparel.

Not a more cowardly rogue in all Bohemia. If you had but looked big and spit at him, he'd have run.  How do you now?

Sweet sir, much better than I was. I can stand and walk.  I will even take my leave of you and pace softly toward my kinsman's.

Shall I bring thee on the way?

No, good-faced sir; no sweet sir.

Prosper you, sweet sir.

(Laughing) Your purse is not hot enough to purchase your spice. I'll be with you at sheepshearing too, or let me be unrolled and my name put in the book of virtue.